A New Way to Think About Holidating: 4 Tips to Help You Thrive During the Holidays
The holidays are supposed to be the happiest time of the year, yet for many, they trigger deep feelings of sadness and anxiety. Being single and not partnered up can be especially hard; but relief is on the way. While jumping back into the dating pool around the holidays may not seem like an ideal situation, there's no wrong time to get your dating groove on.
These four tips will help you sidestep all the mental drama associated with being single over the holidays. Because in holidating you just never know when or where you may meet your match.
1. Be sociable
Start planning your social calendar now. This means calling all your single friends and start buddying up. Make an intention that you’re not going to go down the ‘woe is me’ rabbit hole this year. You’re going to be active socially.
Accept every invitation you receive. People are out at night more than ever this time of year….and in good spirits.
Even if it means skipping a rerun of “Elf”, get out of your house, put on something sexy and go to that party!
Order a pumpkin spice latte at the coffee shop and, without ear plugs in or head down in your phone, have a seat, smile and people watch.
If you happen to notice a handsome man, use your womanly powers to catch his eye with your flirty five second gaze. If he’s interested, he knows it’s safe to approach you. If he doesn’t, he’s either married, swings for the other side or you’re just not his type and that’s ok because there will always be another.
2. Take care of your own temple - your body
Eat well, drink plenty of water, hit the gym and then be merry. Instead of making one more feeble New Year's resolution to join a gym or take a spin class, do it now. Start a new work out routine: get on the treadmill or stair stepper; join a yoga class so that you can release that negative energy to get back in balance.
You will be amazed at how just the littlest bit of movement will lift your spirits and how reducing the amount of junk food, sugar and alcohol will reduce your blues. And sleep — do whatever it takes to get enough of it.
Leverage the law of proximity because this is yet another way to meet a potential match. Men still go to the gym during the holidays.
3. Get into gratitude
Focus on what’s good this holiday season. Start to notice everything in your environment for which you’re grateful: your bed, your sheets, the fact that you woke up and get to be here for another day. Be grateful for your friends, family, your health, for the clothes you have, for getting that manicure.
The simplest things in life can raise your vibration. The higher your vibration, the easier it is to attract positive experiences. So, have an attitude of gratitude this holiday season.
Help others not because you should, but because it is the best antidote to self-pity and seasonal sadness. Find someone who is struggling more than you are, lend them a helping hand, and remember the real meaning of the holidays. Volunteering at the food bank may create an opportunity to meet a quality man who places a high value on giving back.
4. Party with a purpose
Host a party and invite everyone in your building - even if you don’t know them. Put flyers all around and ask everyone to bring one dish. Maybe you have a sweet or savory focus: everyone brings their favorite dessert or appetizer.
Create a theme and make it fun. This will raise your vibration by planning the party and at the party. Hold a holiday potluck party or an ugly sweater holiday party.
Do your best to walk in exuding confidence, even if you’re nervous. Showing approachability, friendliness, and interest will create a positive first impression.
Who knows? You might meet the dapper man with the warm smile who lives down the hall by the eggnog table.
At the holidays, take a deep breath; fill your date card if and when it feels good to you, not because you’re feeling lonely. If you need to take a break from dating, that’s fine.
There are no rules, other than to fall in love with yourself first. It’s the best place to be to start any new relationship.
This article first appeared in PRiME Women.